Parallel Parking and I are rarely on speaking terms. I hate to do it. Parallel Parking hates it when I make a mockery out of its good name by attempting the feat. As this is a mutual hatred, I go out of my way to avoid parallel parking. In Decorah, this isn’t a problem because I can just drive another block or two to find another spot and then walk to where I need to go. In St. Louis, where we are at right now, it’s a different story. Going an extra block or two might end up being a mile or so.
This afternoon, I was forced to parallel park and amazingly, I did it. If I might say so, I did a pretty damn good job. I know this because Steph was being rather mocking and wanted to get out a camera. In truth, she was proud of me. Far too often she’s had to walk extra distance and she really appreciated it.
Points for me! Of course, this went to my head and I got cocky. I needed more points (these are valuable and can be redeemed for such prizes as ‘Calm Down Angry Wife’ or ‘I Want This for Dinner and Not That’ and so forth).
While we were walking to our destination, we passed a flower shop. In the window was a sign that said “50% Off Loose Flowers”.
Me: Loose flowers? Are those the ones that strut around saying ‘C’mon baby! Take advantage of my stamen and pistil!’
Steph: While I am proud that you remembered stamen and pistils, it’s negated by that horrible joke.
I lost points.