So Many Words…

When I was a little kid, I had to fight to keep my letter to Santa from becoming more than a page. This was usually done at the behest of my parents.  See, they apparently did not like hauling the huge bundle that was my novella (aka the Letter to Santa) to the Post Office and paying $25 to mail it to the North Pole.  Multiply that by my twin brother and my older brother, and well, I can’t blame them.

Christmas comes, Christmas goes.

My list has gotten a lot smaller, but I still get a kick out of the things I used to as a kid. My favorite thing ever was looking at the tree on Christmas Eve and seeing all those presents under there.  Even now, I get a little giddy over it, wondering what each little box holds, what that bag stuffed with tissue paper hides (and knowing how easy it is to peek…but resisting, making the torment even worse!), and all of that.

What did I haul in this year?  Books.  Lots of books.  The gift that’ll keep on giving, especially for this aspiring writer.

The Clone Elite by Steven Kent : A wonderful military sci-fi series.  I picked up the first book (The Clone Republic) a few years ago when we were on vacation and I found myself needing something to read.  Got hooked pretty quick.

Hot, Flat, and Croweded by Thomas Friedman : The author behind The Lexus and the Olive Tree.  Never read that one, but I read his other (The World is Flat) on a Sierra Club trip out to California.  Great stuff.  I enjoy the non-fiction genre sometime.

Couch by Benjamin Parzybok : I first heard about this book from this Big Idea column on John Scalzi’s Whatever blog.  It sounded intersting, so  thought I’d give it a try.  My family thought it sounded interesting enough that they gave me two copies 🙂  I passed one off to my brother.  Parzybok is a new author so I like supporting them.

World War Z by Max Brooks : Technically not in my hands yet.  Got a B&N gift cert and I’ll use that to purchase this book.  It’s gotten a lot of good reviews so I wanted to try it.

Of course, all of these have to wait until I’m finished with Patrick Rothfuss’ The Name of the Wind.  Had a slow start, but I’m really getting into it now.  Maybe I’ll try my hand at book reviews when I’m done with them.

Expand Your Vocab In Only 5 Gallons!

A Faucet, otherwise known as This F**KING pile of S**t!
A Faucet, otherwise known as This F**KING pile of S**t!

New Bathroom Faucet? Check!
Pliers? Check!
Screwdriver? Check!
Wrench? Check!
Hack Saw? Why…oh, for the pipe.  Check!
Box Cutter? …Check!
Wire Cutters? Uh…yeah, check?
Hammer? Ah…right here?
Safety Glasses? Er…yeah, I guess.
Ear Plugs? Now just wait a second…
Jig Saw? WTF?

Plumbing!  Expanding your vocabulary since 1840!

Jack Frost Has Your Nose

Yup, it’s cold.

Despite what the calendar says (December 22nd), Winter is here. Temperatures at around -23 with the wind chill.

To put into perspective – that is cold enough that the moisture on your teeth freezes should you be foolish enough not to wear a scarf. It’s cold enough that the fluid in your eyeballs start to reconsider its liquid state and weighs the option of moving toward a solid. This, of course, has an adverse affect on your ability to see, thus causing you to walk to work like a pirate with one eye closed. Negative 23 below is cold enough that you wrap your head in a scarf, a hat, and a hood, so tightly that you can’t just turn your head to look for traffic while crossing the road. Instead, you turn your whole body, looking like some sort of stiff animation from the early ages of television.

Yes, despite the calendar, Winter is here.  And it’s a right nasty bloke.


Betty Page died last night. For those very few reading this who don’t know, Betty was famous as a pin-up girl from the early 50s. Her picture graced the wallet of many a man in the armed forces and probably businessmen throughout the States.

Why do I mention Betty? Well, her passing and iconic status flicked a little switch in my brain, a little writing prompt that I might pursue someday – When John Doe stops by an art gallery while on vacation in Europe, the last thing he expected to find was a picture of a pin-up girl that looked remarkably like his grandmother in her youth.

Okay, it needs some more fleshing out but the seed has been planted, so to speak.

For Want of a Horse’s Neck

The past couple of weeks, I’ve had a craving to put together a puzzle.  It was rather, oh, what’s the word, perplexing?  Normally puzzles and I don’t get along well.  Steph and I very much enjoy doing the Mystery Puzzles though so we headed out to find one.  The local stores didn’t carry any but Steph found the ‘World’s Smallest 1,000 Piece Puzzle’.  We decided to put it together, a good bonding time as husband and wife.

And it was .  Much like driving across the country crammed into a car with your extended family.  Joy.  Crying.  Swearing.  More swearing.  Threats of immolation.  And we were pissed at the puzzle too.

As we neared out goal, as the pieces fell into place (literally), we discovered something.  Our 1,000 piece puzzle was actually 999 pieces.  We were missing the back of a horse’s neck.

I do believe I’ll carry out that threat of immolation now.